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Dear

cubaan kali ini terasa semakin berat. aku cuba kuatkan semangat, cekalkan hati. Kerisauan, aku sembunyikan. tak mau ibuk melihat pedih pilu sedih hati ini. pertemuan dgn doc tadi tak sudah2 berulang tayang dlm minda. keadaan ibuk tak baik. ibuk mengidap kanker tahap 4. Astaghfirullah, kenapa kami tak dapat kesan tanda kanker dari awal?? cell kanker dah melarat dari payu dara ke hati dan entah kemana lagi. doc kata its not a death sentence. tapi kenapa rasanya begitu?

setiap detik aku berjauhan dari ibuk terasa pilu dlm hati. aku sayangkan ibuk. aku tak mau dia pergi. aku tak tau macam mana perasaan ibuk takat ini. tapi kalau aku jadi ibuk, pastinya aku akan bersedih. sekarang ni, aku rindu ibu lagi.

waktu aku di kamar mandi tadi.. aku lihat uban di kepala ku bertambah banyak .. aku rindukan waktu ibuk belai rambutku, cabutkan ubanku .. aku rindu ibuk.

dear,
terima kasih atas doa, kata2 perangsan, yang kadang kala aku tak dapat nak balas. aku kesedihan setiap malam. kesedihan yg dah lama perlalu pergi kini datang lagi.

aku, lunacy.

Comments

Yati WTL said…
dearie...i might not know apa yg u rasa but i want u to be strong and bersabar.

love you. hugs and kisses
The 6 of Us said…
I know nothing we say can help soothe the pain much or lessen your sadness. Just know our doa are with you. Take good care of yourself and family.
she-blocks said…
ujian demi ujian. sungguh, kata-kata sama sekali tidak dapat membantu, tapi doa kami sentiasa bersama.

jaga diri baik, pastikan all your meals are taken. love you.
lunacy said…
Dearie all,

thanks so much. it is such a relief to be able to share my sadness here wif all of u and getting doa after doa for my ibuk from all of u is too much to ask already. am truly bless to hv u all around me. May Allah bless, love and protect us all, Insyallah.
Anonymous said…
WATIEEEEEE.... received your sms on SAturday... i was so lost for words, really no idea how to response...

Babe, GOD is always fair... mungkin ader hikmah di sebalik kejadian... now that you are working part time, you can spend more time with ibuk and your children, isnt that an unforeseen hikmah...

I am sure you are stronger than you think you are... Allah takkan menguji hambanya tanpa sebab!!!

Darling, you MUST promise to take care of yourself first. You MUST be strong for ibuk and family...

Our prayers are with you and Allah is always by your side, ok! InsyaAllah....

I maybe making my trip to Spore very soon (business). Will find time to visit you and ibuk ok!

Till then, love you lots. MamaE
Anonymous said…
**praying for kak lun's betterment**

Amin.
adibah said…
Salam Lunacy,

It's not easy. I understand. Been there, done that. Inilah masanya, untuk Lun & family, berikan segala yang termampu untuk ibuk Lun. Manjakanlah dia, sebagaimana dia manjakan Lun dimasa kecil. Berilah kasih sayang yang paling terbaik.

Jangan tunjukkan kesedihan & kesayuan di depan mata ibuk Lun. Tunjukkan kekuatan. Gembirakan hatinya. Tapi, bila dibelakang ibuk, tak salah untuk Lun menangis, rasa sebak & sedih.. Biar hilang segala tekanan. Saya faham.. it's not easy to stay strong kan?

Semoga diberi ketenangan dan kekuatan menghadapi ujian Allah ini. Selamat berjuang, Lun. Doa saya untuk Lun dah keluarga. Amin.

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