His birthday

This year his bday came a day late cos of leap year. I'm still wondering what to get for him within a very tight budget :) I'm trying my best to be as much as what he hope me to be but time and again, things happened that upset him. I starting to hv doubt on myself these days. Was i really that bad? Ya Rabb, if its all bcos of me, help Ya Rabb.. I love him so much and I want him to enjoy life with happiness and full of Barakah. If I'm the reason that cause him all the sadness, pull me away from him. If I can't be the bridge to pple happiness take me away Ya Rabb, it hurtful enuf as it is and I can't be crying everyday and I hate to put on a happy face when my heart is being torn apart. I'm tired going around asked for help and nothing seems to be working. Now I wish I could fade away and be gone ..