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baby blues..

initially i thot i dun hv anything going on except "the usual" but my thots run to dibdib. My darling dibdib yang sekarang nih makin membesar, he hates me for telling him what to do, he hates me for being right, he hates me for being so protective and i get annoyed cos when he wants something, he kept on repeating the same old thing ova and ova and ova and ova again, until i got so frustrated that i slapped his face. Yeah, dats what happened last saturday. I slapped that beautiful cheeks that ive been kissing every day without fail. The sweet smelly chubby cheek of dibdib. Last night, i lost my temper again, i didn't hit him but i totally ignored him .. the way he cried, i knew he was very sad. But I need to let him know that he can't be taking me for granted. He is after all a child said lovey. I dinch uttered a word but i cried while putting dibdib to sleep. hmm .. I hate me for being harsh and losing my temper but i hate to see him get spoiled by the day. So you see, the pressure is on me cos its my parents who are taking care of him.

btw, i realized something .. as we go to the next stage of our life, we lost touched of the life we had before, it may sound like what the adult called as "maturity" - to me, it is a sad thing.

p/s: there's no more salad bar at Pizza hut?

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